On nights like tonight, I appreciate flexibility. When I got home from work I just felt drained. After receiving the call earlier today from my mom saying her biopsy results showed cancer in her right breast (making her diagnosis bilateral breast cancer) I've been fighting back tears. Once I walked in the door, I let them all out. Needless to say, it's been an emotional day and the last thing I really wanted to do was cook dinner. We also had to run an errand, so I decided we would all just pile in the minivan and stop for something somewhere.
I knew I did not want fast food. Fortunately, the children and my husband all wanted to go to a restaurant and have someone tend to us. So, off we went, on the drive that seemed endless. First, we tried the rule out trick. My kids did not want Mexican, nor did I really. My husband did not want seafood. I really didn't want the big box Italian type restaurants (Olive Garden). My husband suggested Ruby Tuesday's but that didn't seem appealing to me. We have stopped going to TGIFridays, since the only seasoning they seem to know how to use is salt. We considered Macaroni Grill, but that didn't sound all that great to me. Pei Wei was on the list but then I decided I really didn't want that. It seemed every restaurant we mentioned, I ruled out.
Let me cut to the chase. We live in Orlando where we have just about every restaurant imaginable. None really sounded great. I realized in the car as to why. I was seeking comfort in food but in a round about manner. No matter what was mentioned, none of them were going to fill the void I'm feeling right now. My heart hurts. Food will not make it feel better.
My daughter finally said she really wanted to go to Mimi's Cafe. So, that's where we ended up. I really wasn't wanting broiled fish or broiled chicken tonight and I remember my Weight Watcher's leader telling us, "Eat what you love. Don't eat things you don't like." Well, tonight, I didn't LIKE broiled salmon. So, I selected a pasta dish from the petite menu. I can honestly say this was the first time I have EVER ordered from the "small plate" menu but I'm so, so glad I did.
The portion was plenty. The point values were plenty. However, I had eaten light all day long. I had plenty of points to spend and I did. I was outside of my comfort zone as all our indecisiveness made it impossible to truly plan my meal before I left the house (which I normally do when we are going out to dinner). But it all turned out just fine. I only used 4 of my weekly points plus allowance, which is great. I even had a very small amount of dessert (about three bites) and walked out feeling comfortable. Not stuffed. Not uncomfortable. I didn't binge. I ate NORMAL.
I recognized my emotional eating urges and while I still ate a meal I wouldn't normally eat - it was all within the plan and I didn't overeat. I say that's a victory, tonight.